Blog #6- A New Perspective

I gave Frankie a few nights off but it's time to get back to our usual nightly sleuthing. I gave her the nights off because I had found a new friend. Other than Noah, no one seemed to see me. There are plenty of others roaming around, unseen, but they have no interest in one another. Seems that the urge to socialize dissipates after enough time in limbo. But I hadn't been here long enough to be so dissociated. I found someone. Someone else to see me.

 I spend hours each day staring into those yellow eyes, having them stare back at me. The sadness in those eyes, the sadness that seemed to repel the crowds, drew me into the cage with him like a fish to water. Like a ghost to sorrow.

 So far during my tenure as a dead man, nothing had been able to draw me away from my quest for revenge until now. Frankie was now an afterthought. And don't you go feeling sorry for her. She's a real asshole--using the people around her for her own selfish gain and stalking that poor Bret lad. Or maybe that's just me rationalizing. I know I shouldn't be using her. Using her body as a means towards my own selfish ends. But empathizing was a pastime of my living self. Revenge is my only pastime now.

 So yeah, I'm using Frankie, but these past few days she's gotten her sleep and I've gotten the connection I've been craving. Someone who's bars were just as confining as this non-corporeal limbo that is my existence now.

 I've taken enough time off though. Every night the person who put me in this cage slips further into anonymity and knowing that they who took my freedom still has theirs is too unbearable to consider. Sorry Frankie, no time for sleep tonight.

Comments

  1. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2019 at 10:09 AM

    Topic sentences:

    “I spend hours each day staring into those yellow eyes, having them stare back at me.” Great hooking sentence to really engage the audience.
    “So yeah, I'm using Frankie, but these past few days she's gotten her sleep and I've gotten the connection I've been craving.” Great way to accept your problem, but also look at the bright side of things.

    Question:

    Who is this someone else?
    If you know frankie is hurting why still use her?
    Why are you so driven by revenge?

    Unclear on:

    Unclear why you gave frankie a few nights off?

    Suggestion:

    No suggestions…...great job so far!

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 13, 2019 at 10:12 AM

    Frankie
    1. Really good sentence (plot moving, develops character, really nice sentence)
    Someone who's bars were just as confining as this non-corporeal limbo that is my existence now.
    2. Any question you want to ask?
    Does Frankie remember what she experiences as Mr. Evans?
    3. Something you’re unclear about?
    How did she become possessed?
    4. One suggestion to develop character
    Maybe discuss how Frankie feels if she does regain consciousness...her confusion...

    ReplyDelete

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